lovesfeelings' Journal

12:31am: School's out...FORVER!!
Summer is going to be so good. So good.

12:13am: Sometimes I act so dumb. I can't even control it or understand it. It just happens and then what???

Also, I can't figure out my priorities. But hey! Prom is next weekend. And then summer pretty much starts.

I'm just taking it day by day.

11:17pm: High school revelation
Boys pretty much just want one thing...

(other than a fighting monkey or being involved in a heist)

10:33pm: Friends
I was just reading through Kate's lj and it got me thinking about how much I truly appreciate real friends. Kate and I met seven years ago and even though we haven't actually lived in the same state for going on four years we still care about each other and make an honest effort to keep in touch. We may not talk every day or even every week but the next time we see each other we're still just as tight. And it's so comforting just to have friendships like that that you can rely on. And I'm so happy to have Mariam and that we've gotten to be such good friends because this year would have been so much more boring without her and a million real sleepovers and a lot of fake sleepovers. I feel like we understand each other well and that's also comforting when it takes so much less effort to explain yourself because the person already gets you. It would be really sweet if we could end up together somewhere next year or at least close to lessen the separation anxiety I'm going to feel. But actually I'm really excited for next year and the prospect of making so many new friends AND coming home to high school friends because I've never really had that.

moral of the story: friendz rule!!!11!@!21212!!!!@21!@!!!!

p.s. I'm not a lesbian. I just love bffs.

9:44pm: lolzzzzz

9:51pm: omg It's Prom season!!! DramaDramaDramaDramaDramaDramaDramaDramaDrama

11:08pm: Is it just me or did they forget the "L" in the Valentine's Day Google design? It looks like "Googe."

6:57pm:

What I want for Christmas.

9:57pm: I'm so sick of depressing, naked trees. Give me Evergreens!

10:50pm: So everyone's finding out about Early Decision and whatnot. That's cool, but I'm really excited to announce I'm now officially a college applicant. One submitted, four to go!

4:00pm: Apres-ski anything is so sexy. I'm definitely in favor of a ski trip honeymoon.

9:50am: thxgvng
update: my brother is pretty much the coolest dude on earth. now onder all the ladies love his smooth moves and house-rocking charm.

in other news i like boys and stuff.

11:08pm: haha I'm pretty certain the "It's complicated" relationship status on Facebook is a fast-acting quasi-relationship killer. And rightly so.

12:01pm: My house in constantly full of fourteen year old boys. I feel like a less glamorous Wendy living with the Lost Boys.

10:25pm: Tomorrow's Halloween
My mom's out of town. We have no pumpkins. We have no candy.

Worst Halloween ever.

9:26pm: School is ridiculous.
My English teacher is not my parent. My guidance counselor is not my parent. My principal is not my parent.

The public school system will not solve problems with childhood and teen obesity. That's the responsibility of parents. Don't ask for regulations about the fat content of food allowed in school. Instead, educate your own children about their own health. Teach your own children to make their own wise decisions about their own bodies.

12:06am: A couple weeks ago I couldn't function on anything less than 10 hours of sleep. This week I can't seem to make myself sleep more than six or seven hours a night. I just want to be able to fall immediately to sleep, but I can't make my mind stop racing.

We're studing poetry in English. I pretty much hate it. After 30 minutes of discussing a 16 word poem, I can't help but lost interest. But how can the discussion ever die if no one is ever wrong and everyone is right? It gets out of control.

Most of school and especially AP essays are all about the formula anyway. Teacher, show me how to identify the blanks and I'll fill them with whatever makes you happy.

But ohhh gosh. I'm supposed to take the Math Level 2 SAT Saturday. I haven't worked a math problem since my Pre Cal exam in June. What is going to happen? I just don't know...

6:48pm: I HATE GROUP WORK.

AKA I HATE EVERYONE BUT ME.

10:11pm: So, Senior Year
It's been more work than I was expecting, but I'll get in the groove soon and stop lamenting everything. Cross country's become more of a diversion from school demands than an intense focus for me. I'll probably enjoy it more this way, without so much invested in it.

I'm passively looking for a job to pick up this winter in place of Indoor Track. I need money for college and a change of pace.

Yayyy for college!!! I'm anticipating a few more visits to UVA this year. Entirely too much fun. That may be my first choice school, but I can't decide. Maybe I want to go there for the wrong reasons??? or at least not the best reasons and I don't want to be THAT girl that's so easily influenced by ephemeral things like friendships and BOYS, etc. Whatever. I'm also visiting William and Mary this Friday...sitting in on some classes and spending the day on campus with my friend to get a real feel for it.

This is longer than I normally post (aka nothing ever), but I've had a lot to think about lately and it's showing up here a little bit. I don't even know who reads this anymore.

Oh angst. How you've become my dear friend. I'm frustrated about a boy who is entirely too right for me for how far away he is. But what's new, right? hahaha Maybe one day I'll be completely taken with a local boy for a change. Sure would be a lot more convenient, but probably not my style. I did give it a try at least once this year.

I never call anyone like I say I will anymore. That used to be my biggest pet peeve and now it's totaly my pitfall. It's not because I forget or because I don't care. I just can't manage my time to save my life. But I always seem to have something to complain about in that respect.

11:07pm: Oh hey Sam. What's up?

11:19pm: ay carumba
Tomorrow morning I leave for a three week long Spanish immersion camp. Hopefully it'll be a blast and I'll come back with lots of ridiculous stories and sweet bilingual friends. I know I'll end up having fun, but really I'm a little bummed to be leaving for so long when I am really enjoying all aspects of the summer life- especially a really cute boy who makes me happy and several cuddle-happy girls. Oh well.

See you later, Chesapeake.


Also, BEACH WEEK IN A MONTH AND A HALF (roughly). Geeze Louise, I'm psyched.

8:39pm: Dinner Conversation
"Jesse, do you even know what the word congenital means?"

"Well, con is something bad right? So is it when your genital is deformed?"

10:12pm: I used to take myself so seriously it wasn't even funny. I was cynical and jaded. Ridiculously so and I don't even know why. But lately, I cannot take anyone seriously, especially myself. I guess it's kind of refreshing. I like high school and laughing all the time.

9:26pm: So tonight I tried to do a pull-up on the molding above the doorway to my kitchen. It couldn't exactly handle it. hahaha

The Captain is thrilled.

9:56pm: Our girl scout cookies were finally delivered today.


I cried tears of joy.